A very nearly 24 year old me ( no idea how that happened) has just spent the last 2 hours reading over old blog posts, smiling and remembering how much this blog helped me through a very bumpy ride. If any of you guys still blog/ happen to click onto this I’ve started a new blog purely for fun and to remind me to write just for the hell of it. I’d love it if ye took a look. Also please comment if you’re still blogging so I can add you to my new reading list.

Lots of love,
Claire

https://missfixx.wordpress.com/2015/02/19/begin-again/

Ever have one of those days where you have to keep repeating “one thing at a time” to yourself in order to stay sane? Between college deadlines, applications and a to do list as long as my arm, like ..eh…buy food! ( seriously, hummus and pitta bread cannot be a good idea for dinner 3 days in a row) I just might start rocking backwards and forwards any minute now.

Not to buy into the stereotypical arts student idea, but all I want to do is drink coffee and sleep, pity you can’t do both at the same time.

Naps take time, too much time! I considered going to yoga this evening, but there’s something a little off about skipping the college work that’s sending you in a spin in the first place, in order to stop stressing over college. Doing the assignments would probably be a better idea.

But I’m taking 4 minutes. oh yeah, you heard me, four whole minutes, just to listen to this and do nothing. Who needs yoga when you have Dolores O’ Riordan crooning in your ear.

Bleary Eyes

March 24, 2014 — 2 Comments

I’m not a morning person, never have been. Some people hear their alarms and bounce out of bed. If this applies to you, I applaud you…and hate you. I’m far more likely to hit the snooze button and attempt to bury back under the duvet, preferably until I hit Narnia

Image

When you’re working you don’t have a choice. The problem is unless you want to be in college for the rest of your life ( I learnt this one the hard way ) you don’t have a choice either. How do I survive the injustice of having to get up. every .single.morning. Music.

And coffee.

Earphones are the most antisocial piece of technology ever invented, and my God I love them! That ” I want to chat” person attempting to make eye- contact on an already steamed up, cramped up bus? Ha, good luck to ya buddy. I don’t do small talk until after 9, at least

Here’s one of my favourite, thaw out tunes. Add a piping hot coffee and a bus partner ho is happy to ignore me right back, and the morning becomes bearable.

 

Saturday Expectations : Get up and go for a run, cook a tasty but healthy lunch, catch up on some study. Go for drinks/catch up with friends safe in the knowledge that no matter how late the night gets today has been productive.

HA.

Saturday Reality ; It’s 3 pm, there’s no milk and the shop is a whole 5 minutes away. Not only would I have to go outside..I’d have to get out of my onsie. I have two more hours before I absolutely have to throw myself into the shower and even then, I’ll be running around like a headless chicken trying to find my other shoe. I’ll be running for the bus whilst trying to convince my house mate I’m already on it. Pulling off that shneaky manoeuvre where you press your phone into your ear so as to drown out all other noise. Foolproof I tell you!

But it’s alright! I’ll get loads done tomorrow

This is such a great lazy ( let’s be honest ) Saturday tune. So chill, by the end your seeped of all tension and wondering who owns the sexy voice…and where the replay button is dammit.

“Smoke with me babe
And laugh with me baby
And lay with me baby
Cause I just want the simple things”

~ Junkie ~

March 22, 2014 — Leave a comment

That frustrated feeling, fingers restless but oddly still, like the need to do it is brewing, dancing up the delicate bones and squeezing gently at the joints. Do it.

Thoughts aren’t clear and steady. That would be a relief. Instead they fog your head, swirling determinedly, just enough to make you acutely aware of their presence yet refusing to settle. Do it.

The overwhelming feeling that to start, to really start is a like a careless flick of a domino. Simple, but irreversible. Just do it.

Why do it? Because you don’t have a choice. You never did, not really.

Just write.

Image

A couple of nights ago, I sat up and wrote about the blissful heat. Pride really does come before a fall.
The next night in the space of an hour I went from messing about with my house mates to quite literally throwing my insides up and becoming a sweaty shivering mess.

Too much information? Apologies, I’ve spent a lot time with guy friends recently and they find all bodily functions hilarious,

For example Danny : Hey, how you doing?
Me : Better, actually managed to keep
breakfast down!
Danny : Bet it comes back up as lunch in an
hour!

Four days later, I never want to see dry toast, flat 7-up or sunshine ever again. Vomiting bugs are never fun, when it’s the hottest week of the year and there are no cold spots anywhere. Like I said..pride…fall.

On the bright side ( no pun intended, I threw my sense of humour up 2 days ago ) not being able to move leaves plenty of time for, well, arsing about on the internet actually.

Downloading new music is always great, stumbling upon new artists, the ones where you just have to stop and listen always give me buzz.

So much so that sometimes I forget old loves, the songs I listened to when I was 15 and NOBODY UNDERSTOOD. The ones that were on my first iPod, not necessarily classics. Just my classics

“Some things in this world
Man, they don’t make sense
Some things you don’t need
Until they leave you
And they’re things that you miss ”
– Bright Lights, Matchbox Twenty

Nothing nurses you through a bad few days quite like it. That and my wonderful ridiculous friends,

*No breakfast did not come back up as lunch

As I write this I’m lying on top of my covers. There is a dead swollen heat filling the room,making the usual comfort of burying under blankets unthinkable . The window is open as far as I dare without the glow from my laptop enticing any unwelcome wings yet still attempting to coax in a breeze.

My bare feet are propped against the radiator, the coolness of the metal soothing after a long day serving tables.

There’s something not right about this scenario. I’m Irish.

Heat is quite literally a foreign concept. Summer memories involve stubbornly wearing shorts to the airport, covered with a warm hoodie because your bloody freezing and running under an inevitable misty overcast sky before finally reaching the plane and eagerly awaiting the sunshine.

We do get a summer but it normally lasts for 3 days. Everyone suddenly cheers up, drops everything and scoots outside “sure it will be gone tomorrow we may aswell make the most of it”.

Yet this year it’s not going. The sun determinately shines on. People are eating outside at the restaurant I work in. Which was great as I got to pretend I was working abroad for the first while. As the heat continued and customers have requested shade (it’s called eating inside bright spark) and complained about flies buzzing (I’m terribly sorry sir I’ll ask said fly to stop) my enthusiasm has waned. On the up side the back of my neck has a great colour.

Between final exams, exhausting jobs and a general weariness that hung over the last months of the college year this summer was always going to be a much needed break for us. It’s a time where we all vowed to work hard but play harder. To get out and go to gigs in the evenings, to take random trips and enjoy home instead of wishing we were away.

It’s my last summer for a while in a city that that I am oh so in love with. To be able to spend balmy evenings exploring hidden beer gardens with my favourite people the sun meandering lazily along with us as we sip pints and wind each other up is an extra gem.

Sooner than later the rain and clouds will sweep through again. But this stolen time before responsibilities have quite caught up to us. these memories will be tinged with frozen beer bottles, bare legs and writing in the dark listening to the city.

This is also a really beautiful piece of music. Have a listen.

I hope the sun is shining wherever you are.
Lily x

~ Daily Tune ~

June 1, 2013 — 3 Comments

I always figured I’d wake up one day and organisation would have effortlessly swept into my life. Yet this morning I found myself crawling around my bedroom floor and flinging clothes out of the way in a desperate attempt to locate my missing work shoe. I’ve never been one of these people with spare time in the mornings ( why get out of bed a second earlier than you absolutely have to! ) so it was more like crawling through a pile of clothes and muttering every swear word under the sun whilst throwing anxious looks at the clock. Eventually I had to accept defeat and peg it the bus stop in silly shoes that pinched all day.

Getting out of the wrong side of the bed is one thing, attempting to lift it and look underneath before coffee. No.

Panned out on the bus catching my breath this came on my iPod. It’s impossible to listen and not feel just a tiny bit better no matter how much the world and your shoes are out to get you..

Cease to Begin was the second album from Band of Horses. It’s got a great mellow rootsy vibe and usually serves as a soothing balm for the end of a long day. This is definitely the most upbeat song from the album and did the trick on my grumpy caffine deprived self this morning

“If your trials end, are really getting you down
We had a close call, I didn’t even see it, then another one, I hardly believed it at all.”

Left Size 4 Converse shoe still missing….Reward offered on safe return

Nightly Tune

March 31, 2013 — 2 Comments

I’ve had a few much needed few days off work recently and finally got to kick back with my laptop and a cup of tea. Yes I am Irish and lets put it this way America may run on Dunkins, but here in Ireland we run on Barrys.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=BSmPNbU15Q0#t=3s

I love that add reminds me of being little and curled up infront of the fire. getting a kick out of the fact that I was drinking Barrys too, what can I say I’m the youngest ;)

It goes without saying the I’m ridiculously in love with all things English but writing can be as draining as it is cathartic and I’ve lapsed recently, mostly pure to sheer exhaustion in the evenings.

However a bottle of wine or ten with friends and a good slumber and it’s all I want to spend my evening doing. However sure I was pretty that this is an industry that I want to immerse myself in…now I’m certain. And that’s a great feeling.

This is also a great song ;)

Enjoy the weekend, no point in working if time off isn’t enjoyed to the full. ( This is how I’m explaining that new dress to my bank account)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?list=HL1364687213&v=L-0ONH_sF2Q&feature=player_detailpage

Do you ever get that feeling when you haven’t written for a while? An antsy nagging feeling that won’t relent?

This tends to really strike me hard at silly o’ clock and then I spend the next day doing an impressive zombie impression at work.

But hey a normal sleeping pattern is way overrated, sometimes it’s when darkness and silence has settled and you can just see the stars past the cold mist creeping at the window. That’s when life get’s interesting.

So right now I’ll embrace the witching hour, knowing full well I’ll curse myself for being so silly when I’m knecking back coffee tomorrow.

When I was little I loved The BFG by Roald Dahl. If I peeked out the window after everyone had gone to sleep a friendly giant just might appear..you never know!

“The witching hour, somebody had once whispered to her, was a special moment in the middle of the night when every child and every grown-up was in a deep deep sleep, and all the dark things came out from hiding and had the world all to themselves.”
~ Roald Dahl

Whether your writing, sipping tea, just have to finish that last chapter or simply need to mellow.

Wake Well.

Lily x